What a hard time for both of them. Ellen playing pool seemed typical and a little scary, in spite of John's inner monologue. It was so sweet to see Ellen soft and letting John do things for her "toast is just burned bread" lol and John loving and thinking of a future. Pity he didn't wake her up to say goodbye- his rationalizations were pretty thin just then- such a coward in the small ways.
But whyyyy couldn't he come back?