I can kill you with my brain...

[briarwood]

I need to sleep for a week.

First, because I may not have said it yet, it was fantastic to see you guys on Friday. Thanks so much for a lovely evening.

I think my karma felt the need to balance it out 'cause I've been battling the migraine from Hell ever since. Recovering now...

Second, can any of the Merlin fans on my flist point me to some good screen caps for the show. Google seems to be hiding them from me. Or are there no HQ pics available?

The rest behind a cut because this got long.

Last night I was at the launch of Stonewall Cymru's new recruitment guide. I was there with my work's HR recruitment team to represent the LGBTT network group. It was a good event, not too long, nicely casual (though we were promised pirates and I didn't see any).

That's officially my last act as LGBTT chair at my place of work. I've been doing the job for three years now and I just don't have the energy to do it any more. If there were serious problems in the organisation; if there was a fight that truly needed fighting, I would stay on. But as things stand, while it's not the most gay-friendly place to work, it's not that bad either. The policies we have in place are good. Of course, there's a big difference between having the policies and getting everyone to follow them, but the groundwork is there. I would love to have made a more lasting difference, to get diversity issues at the top of the agenda, but it's not going to happen and I'm sick of flogging this particular dead horse.

I'm giving serious thought to going back to study. It would have to be part time, and I'd have to get work to fund it, which would seriously restrict my choice of subjects. What I really want to do is something in the gender-studies field, but there aren't many decent undergrad courses in the UK anyhow and study abroad just isn't an option for me. My second choice would be Philosophy, but work wouldn't fund that (their loss). From a work point of view the logical choice would be Economics. Or Sociology with a strong statistical component. Or straight statistical mathematics. Of those choices, economics interests me most...Sociology is the science of stating the bloody obvious and would probably just irritate me. (Why spend so much time "proving" what everyone already knows? Is the knowledge somehow different because they give things fancy names?) I'm good at Maths but I don't enjoy it. Economics is interesting. I disliked the subject at school but I have a much better understanding of it now. I'm just not sure if it's enough. I'm more of a humanities person. Getting a decent degree in a work-related subject could be a huge advantage for me at work. I can't freaking afford it, but I can find a way, somehow, if work will pay my fees.

But here's the rub: am I willing to sacrifice what I'd have to for a subject I'm not passionate about? You see, it would mean I'd have to quit writing fic. I don't know if I can do that. Even part time study at a regular uni would take up too much of my time for me to do both. I looked at the OU but their best offering is a combo Maths and Economics degree - emphasis on the Maths. I couldn't do that. Maths is only fun for me if it has some practical application. Statistics I can do - that's my job. "Pure" maths is about as much fun as watching paint dry.

In good news...

My Sentinel story is progressing. I was hoping to finish the first draft this week, but I've been too busy. I'm going out again tonight - for fun, this time, not work - and Saturday I'm off to Memorabilia in Birmingham. So it'll probably be next week. And editing this one is going to take a while because there are a few places where I skipped over things to get past my writers block. But progress is being made :-)

Memorabilia - anyone else going to be there? I'm going on Saturday and hope to arrive about 11.30. My coach gets in to B'ham around 10.30 but that's assuming it's on time and I'll have to walk from Digbeth to New Street and then get a train to the NEC. I can stay until about 5pm but probably won't; depends how much money I spend :-) and who's around.

On a similar note - if any of my Brit friends who are not going would like me to shop for you, comment and let me know. I am limited to what I can carry (so no swords, m'kay) but it's a great place for cult tv/film stuff.

Comments

[birggitt.livejournal.com]

I can see you are facing a quite difficult decision here... mostly because, as much as study is your decision, you can't freely choice your field of study, and that's bad.
Good thing about my country? As you NEVER are gonna got any help in your studies, and most likely, you'll ended working in something totally different, you have no pressure to choice *headdesk*
About Merlin, there are quite a lot of post of HQ screencaps at merlinxarthur

[morgan32.livejournal.com]

Good thing about my country? As you NEVER are gonna got any help in your studies

I'm not sure how that's a good thing.

It is a tough one. I'm looking into the courses on offer from the two universities closest to me, and distance learning options. There's an Oxford college that does distance learning but I think it's only for postgraduate study. For undergraduate it's really OU or nothing. There are non-degree courses available at university level, but those wouldn't be useful to me. Just expensive fun.

My ace-in-the-hole: if I can stand six years of a subject I don't really want, I would have much better choices at postgrad level, which is, I guess, my holy grail. Part time postgrad study is easier to get into and funding slightly easier to find...but I need the undergraduate degree first. That's what I had planned for myself ten years ago, before life took a different turn.

[birggitt.livejournal.com]

I'm not sure how that's a good thing.
Because takes off any pressure in your choice. You go with whatever you love, because you love it. Is kind of... vocational. You don't really expect to find a work in your field, so you love History? Philosophy? Language? Go for it.
If you are lucky, you'll end working as a teacher. If not... well, whatever you can get.

Yes, I see why it is though. I hope you find something that fits both, your preferences and chances to get foundig.
And yes, life tends to do that, doesn't it? *sigh*

[snailbones.livejournal.com]

Tough choices there hon. I know what you mean - you can give up almost anything for a subject that means the world to you, but for something that's a stepping stone to something else? Ack. Toughie.

Good luck with whatever you decide, and I hope the head is better so you can enjoy Birmingham.

[morgan32.livejournal.com]

Thanks! I had a talk with folks at work today about what hoops I'll need to jump through for funding. It sounds do-able, if I can find the right course nearby. My workplace will, in theory, fund almost anything if you can build a business case for it, but budgets are tight everywhere this year. Theory and practice might not exactly mesh.

But I'm going to try. Research first...

[thanatos-kalos.livejournal.com]

You might try something like Ethics, which comes under philosophy-- call it business ethics or social philosophy or something vaguely business-y. Maybe something likr Human geography, with a stats component? There's a guy at Newport, I think, Adrian (?) Chadwick, who does that, and is actually an interesting speaker-- I met him at Bristol. (He might be at Lampeter, though...can't remember...)

[morgan32.livejournal.com]

You might try something like Ethics, which comes under philosophy

Yeah, I've read a little ethics, though mostly via theology. Metaphysics is closer to my thing, though.

For work to fund it, I would have to be doing something that would directly benefit the business. Sociology, psychology or geography would work if I were in a different area, or wanted to go there. Psych I know I couldn't do. It's too stacked with bullshit and I don't have the patience. Geography really isn't my thing. Sociology...well, that's my ex's subject, which kinda puts me off.

But where I am work-wise is economic statistics. I've got to get the director of my division to sign off on funding which means he has to see the benefit. PPE would be ideal (gets me out of the math part), but I need to find somewhere local that does it. (And then get in! Which ain't as easy as it could be.)

[thanatos-kalos.livejournal.com]

Well, there are ways of spinning virtually anything to look like it'll help what you're doing, especially if your director is susceptible to large words. :P And as for getting in, if you want a ref letter I'm happy to give you one, as well as helping with all the entry forms.

[morgan32.livejournal.com]

Thank you for that offer! I will most definitely take you up on that should I need it.

From last night's research, UW Neport has nothing I'd touch with a ten-foot bargepole, which isn't really a surprise. Cardiff has some great undergrad programmes but none of those that attract me are offered on a part time basis (And for straight economics they want ABB. I have ABC - off by 1 grade).

Which puts me right back to Open University or forget-about-it. OU has its advantages - like no entry requirements. The application process is simple and the foundation courses are open to all, then you get onto the level 2 courses by passing the foundation. Which is good: it means I wouldn't have to explain my somewhat odd academic record.

But OU is sort of flexibly inflexible. In theory you can get a degree studying the most ecclectic mix of subjects you can think of because it's all about the points; in practice if you want a named degree (ie in a specific subject rather than their "open" BA) the requirements are very specific.

On the bright side, the foundation courses are pretty broad and looking at the program there's an intro to social studies course that fits a range of choices for me. It starts in May next year. So I might apply for that, and defer making any actual decision about the final degree I want until next year. It would count as credit for transfer to Newport or Cardiff if I find a way to do that. With my credits from my unfinished degree at Keele I might be able to skip the first year that way.

Next job: find out exactly how to convince work to fund my study!