briarwood: Supernatural: Sam's Ass :-) (SPN Sam Ass)
Morgan Briarwood ([personal profile] briarwood) wrote2008-06-26 12:37 pm

Thoughts on "dub-con" as a fanfic kink

This is a response to [livejournal.com profile] thefrogg's post about consent issues in fanfic and to [livejournal.com profile] theladyscribe's response in which she describes one of her own fics as possibly "dub-con" (Dubious consent).

This is a touchy subject. Here's where I have to insert my standard feminist disclaimer: I am not discussing real life. I'm discussing fanfic, and specifically sexual-fantasy fanfic. In real life, there's no such thing as "dubious consent". In real life, either informed consent exists, or it's rape. Please don't think I can't make that distinction between fiction, fantasy and reality.

In fanfic, we're not dealing with the real world. In putting warnings on fanfic, we must acknowledge real-world issues, because (hello!) our readers are real people. If we don't acknowledge that real-world issues affect them, then the warning is pointless. So I see [livejournal.com profile] thefrogg's point, that a story where consent is less than explicit might be triggering for some readers.

The second part of this issue is the ages-old argument about the reasons for warnings/info and suchlike. Without reiterating the arguments here, the result is, broadly speaking, two camps of "warn-ers". One camp who warn "responsibly" i.e. who conscientiously include warnings for everything contained within a fic, and another camp who regard warnings as optional and might fail to warn if, for example, the "warning" might also be a spoiler.

For the reader, particularly the reader who wishes to avoid certain kinds of fic, this presents a dilemma. I want to be able to say of [livejournal.com profile] theladyscribe's story "since there was no warning for non-con or dub-con, clearly the sex was intended to be consensal." To me, this is self-evident. In the story, Jess wakes up to find Dean touching her; they go on to have sex. In canon Dean can be a misogynist pig, but I don't see him as a man who goes where he's not wanted; so it wouldn't occur to me to think of the scenario as non-consensual. Dean wouldn't have done it if he didn't have reason to believe she would consent.

Unfortunately, every fanfic author who fails to warn for a rape scene in a fic makes a liar out of me on that presumption.

This is a pain in the ass. Because for me, dub-con is my second biggest fanfic kink. *points to standard feminist disclaimer above* And one of my biggest pet peeves is fics labelled "Dub-con" when they're really, really not.

There's an obvious conflict here betwen "dub-con" as a warning of potentially triggering material, and "dub-con" as a kink. If all it takes to make a story dub-con is the absence of a "yes", then my kink is doomed to frustration. I think there's an argument for presuming consent in fanfic, because we presume an awful lot of things in fanfic. Characterisation is based not solely on the story text, but on what the fanfic author expects the reader to know about the characters. When I wrote Ceremony of Innocence which ends with Sam leaving Dean and getting on a plane, I expected the reader to be aware that Dean's afraid of flying, that Sam knows Dean's afraid of flying and therefore Sam's choice of transport should mean something more than just it's the quickest way to get to California. Similarly, if I write - or read - a PWP, I presume the sex is consensual unless something (including the warnings on the fic) suggests otherwise. That's assuming the characters involved aren't canonically disposed to rape...but if they were I don't think I'd be reading about them.

Actual dub-con (and here I'm talking about dub-con-as-kink) is very hard to write. It's not something written "by mistake". All too often, fics labelled as "dub-con" are not "dubuious" at all: it's a label for consensual sex with some BDSM elements or for rape fic in which the victim experiences orgasm. These are not dub-con.

True dub-con rides the razor's edge of consent. It's the scenario in which consent is given, but not freely. It's the scenario in which the person wants it, really wants it, but is contrained to say no for social or political or emotional reasons. It's the fuck-or-die scenario which forces a couple not ready for it into a sexual relationship. It's the "sex-pollen" scenario where they don't realise there's an outside force acting on them.

I'm going to give examples from my own fic, not to show off my stories, but because only on my own fic can I speak with authority about the intent behind the words. Whether the intent carries through to the final result is for others to judge. For the sake of clarity, both of these are Supernatural fics featuring incest.

My own Restrain, Release (Sam/Dean) is not dub-con, because although Sam took advantage of Dean being drugged/drunk and Dean didn't specifically consent to sex on that night, the boys had discussed it beforehand and Dean's consent is implied because he has a safeword and chooses not to use it.

Dean shivered, and this time not because of the cold. Sam's casual tone unnerved him a little, as did the fact that he'd apparently slept through being stripped, bound and gagged. That just wasn't possible.

"Good boy," Sam said softly, in the same tone he would have used talking to a dog. "Now, listen carefully, Dean. There are three rules. One: you will obey every order I give you, at once, no arguments. That shouldn't be too difficult; I know how you love to take orders."

Fuck you! Dean thought, but he made no sound. He could almost remember... They went to a club last night, one of those places with live music and... But the memory danced out of reach.

"Two," Sam went on relentlessly. "You may not talk without permission. Three: you may not come without permission." Sam blew gently on Dean's chest, across his nipples; to Dean Sam's breath felt hotter than it should have. "Do you understand the rules, Dean? Make noise for yes."

Dean grunted past the cloth in his mouth.

"Good boy," Sam said again. Dean half-expected him to pat his head. "Do you remember your safe-word?"

For a moment, Dean had no idea what he meant, because he couldn't remember them planning anything like this. Then the memory came back to him, a conversation they'd had weeks before. Dean had told Sam that fancy safe-words were dumb and you should just say stop.


My story In Vino Veritas (John/Dean) is dub-con because although Dean gives consent, actively participates in the sex and has an orgasm, he has very conflicted feelings about sex with John and (although this is not specified in the story) he's fifteen years old; legally and morally too young to consent.

John's hand gripped Dean's forearm, preventing him from leaving. "Dean, wait. I ain't so drunk as that."

"Bullshit. You can't even stand."

John's grip on his arm tightened. Dean met his hooded eyes, trying to understand. John looked like he wanted to say something, but no words came.

But Dean understood. His father needed him.

Dean swallowed past the tightness in his throat, and nodded slowly. "It's okay, Dad." He withdrew his arm from John's grip and stripped off his t-shirt. He stood and unzipped his pants. Please god don't let Sammy wake up... Dean removed his underpants and socks, leaving everything in a heap on the floor. He straightened and stood, naked, before his father.

John gazed at him for a moment, long enough for Dean to squirm under the scrutiny. Without speaking, John pushed back the blanket. Dean, shivering in the cold, lay down beside him.


(For some readers the age issue and father/son power dynamic will shift the above story from dub-con to non-con; that's fine. Everyone's mileage differs a little and I have no problem with someone disagreeing with me on this. That's kind of the point. True dub-con should seem like non-con to some readers.)

For me, a dub-con scenario has two essential elements. First that the dominant partner in the sex has no reason, within the scene itself, to think the sex is non-consensual. In my John/Dean example, you can argue that John should have no reason to presume consent from Dean (and you'd be right!) But within the scene itself, Dean voluntarily gets into bed with John.

Similarly in "sex pollen" and "fuck-or-die" scenarios, the participants generally do consent to the sex within the actual scene. Whether that consent can be considered genuine depends on the wider context: did a relationship exist between them prior to the incident? Would these two people ever have slept together if some outside force hadn't interfered? If there was a pre-existing attraction, were there other things keeping them apart and what's the likelihood that they would have overcome those things on their own?

The second essential element in dub-con is this: if you were hypothetically able to ask the non-dominant partner (or both of them for a sex-pollen story where both were equally affected), after the event, whether or not there was consent he or she would answer either "yes" or "I don't know". That "yes" may be self-deception, but he or she must believe it.

There's another dub-con scenario, one which I've almost never seen in fanfic: the scenario where one partner genuinely has no idea that the other isn't freely consenting to the sex. Most slave!fic could take that line, as a slave, by definition is not free to refuse a master, but I've rarely seen a fic that handles it well. Admittedly, I've read a lot less of that genre in the past few years, but the general line in slave!fic seems to be either a) they're in love, so the consent issues inherent in the master/slave relationship are ignored, or b) it's rape or non-con, or presumed consensual in the same way prostitution is "consensual".

I would really love to see a slave!fic in which a loving master is genuinely shocked when his slave, given the capacity to consent, turns around and says "no, I'm leaving". But I guess that wouldn't suit the slashy need for a happy ending.
elf: Rainbow sparkly fairy (Default)

[personal profile] elf 2008-06-26 09:08 pm (UTC)(link)
There's an obvious conflict here betwen "dub-con" as a warning of potentially triggering material, and "dub-con" as a kink.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

I have various kinks. Dub-con is solidly among them. Some of my kinks, are serious triggers for other people. I am annoyed that there's no common labeling differences between "if you're triggered by X, maybe avoid this story" variety, and "if you like X, this story is for you."

[identity profile] mab-browne.livejournal.com 2008-06-26 09:52 pm (UTC)(link)
Interesting bit of meta. I've wrestled with my interest in non-con/dub-con for a while, and interestingly, the more I've been exposed to it, the less it's become a kink. I think that might be the hooboy! slash phenomenon coming into play. At first, you're just excited to know that something exists and that other people do this thing. Then the first flush of joy and novelty wears off, and you start noticing just how bad so much of what you're reading is. And it's a lot harder to find 'good' dub-con than it is to find 'good' slash.

[identity profile] thefrogg.livejournal.com 2008-06-26 10:09 pm (UTC)(link)
Hi! Thanks for contributing to what is turning out to be a very interesting topic (or in my mind, entire web of topics).

I keep trying to point out that the point of my entire essay was story construction, but I think I'm just going to give in and drift with the topic discussion.

I think it's not just an argument over dub-con as a possible trigger point vs. dub-con as a kink - it's the interpretation of the whole warnings system. Are warnings listing contents that might be triggers? Or are they possible kinks? Personally, I use them as triggers. Perhaps we need to start adding (kink) or (possible trigger) after things. Or having separate kinks and warnings lines. I don't know. My headings get complicated enough as it is.

[identity profile] morgan32.livejournal.com 2008-06-27 06:51 am (UTC)(link)
I keep trying to point out that the point of my entire essay was story construction

If I interpreted you correctly, you were essentially asking people to be aware of what they're writing which seems totally reasonable to me. I didn't even have an issue with anything you said until I saw the other essay; the combo kinda pushed a button for me because that dub-con label is a real pet peeve for me. It really is a kink of mine and when the label is (as I see it) misused it's sorta like someone's promising candy but serving beans.

I think it's not just an argument over dub-con as a possible trigger point vs. dub-con as a kink - it's the interpretation of the whole warnings system. Are warnings listing contents that might be triggers? Or are they possible kinks?

The trouble is they are both. It's easier with rape/non-con because fandom broadly agrees on what that means (poor writing and occasional lack of thought aside). So whether the reader is looking to read or to avoid rape fic, the warning or label serves the same purpose. Most of the other things we warn about are similar: whether trigger or kink they mean the same thing.

What your essay did for me is highlight something I hadn't really processed before - that this isn't true for dub-con as a warning. That maybe the reason so many fics are incorrectly (to me) labelled dub-con is because the term as a trigger warning has a very different threshold for consent than when it describes a kink. And I don't really have a solution to that conflict. I don't think there is a solution, because the former is based on reality (there's no such thing as dubious consent in RL) and the latter on a fantasy that is, for some of us, super-hot.

[identity profile] morgan32.livejournal.com 2008-06-27 07:01 am (UTC)(link)
I am annoyed that there's no common labeling differences between "if you're triggered by X, maybe avoid this story" variety, and "if you like X, this story is for you."

I think in many cases, there's no real distinction to make. If a fic contains blood-play or watersports or character death in the warnings, that warning serves to attract anyone who wants to read those things. There's no conflict, because it means the same thing to both sides.

Somehow, though, when the subject is consent and sex, we (and by "we" I mean fandom) get confused. Even "non-con" can be a confusing label, because there's a big difference between a non-con scene that's written to be erotic and a non-con scene that's intended to be awful and shocking. And the label/warning doesn't tell you much about how graphic it will be, either. And that confusion seems to become even more difficult to navigate when you get to dub-con.

[identity profile] morgan32.livejournal.com 2008-06-27 07:04 am (UTC)(link)
And it's a lot harder to find 'good' dub-con than it is to find 'good' slash.

I second that!

I have a major non-con kink which I really struggle with; it's the one aspect of my own sexuality I find difficult to accept. But though I avoid non-con for that reason, I can satisfy that kink with well written dub-con. You're right; it's hard to find.

[identity profile] rockeandroll.livejournal.com 2008-06-28 03:45 am (UTC)(link)
When I first started reading [livejournal.com profile] metafandom I fell on my head a lot when there were debates about warnings. My background in fandom was low-porn, high-plot, and my experiences with warnings were not with these kinds of 'trigger' issues so much as "If I'd known this pairing was going to be in the background of your fic I wouldn't have read it!" or "You labelled this Naruto/Sasuke when it's really Sasuke/Naruto!" (Good old Naruto fandom.)

I realised that often when I was arguing with people about warnings, we were doing it in such an abstract way that we didn't realise we were talking about different things. What I was talking about were more often than not 'labels' - markers like pairing or genre to tell the prospective reader what the story is about. (I've written some fics that I didn't want to put pairing labels on, which is where I started having conflict with people who advocated warnings for everything.)

When discussions got a bit more explicit I started to get a better picture. When people started talking about 'triggers' I realised that as attached as people can be to OTPs, reading Sasuke/Naruto when you thought you were getting Naruto/Sasuke isn't likely to be a traumatic experience.

Basically what I'm getting at is that I think there needs to be a distinction between 'warnings', which alert the reader to potentially disturbing or upsetting content, and 'labels', which hint at what the story is about. Or to put it even more simply, labels are there to attract readers and warnings are there to, in a sense, turn them away.

[identity profile] morgan32.livejournal.com 2008-06-28 01:57 pm (UTC)(link)
I realised that as attached as people can be to OTPs, reading Sasuke/Naruto when you thought you were getting Naruto/Sasuke isn't likely to be a traumatic experience.

Oh, I don't know. When I was in Stargate SG-1 fandom there were plenty of fans who claimed to be seriously traumatised by any hint of het romance in a fic...

Or to put it even more simply, labels are there to attract readers and warnings are there to, in a sense, turn them away.

Yes, that sums it up pretty well. I have issues with "warning" for everything myself; generally if there's something I don't want to give away I make the warning as vague as I can and add a note that the reader can always ask me about specific triggers.

The thing is, for most things, whether you call it a warning or a label, it serves the same purpose. For some reason piss-play is quite popular in Supernatural slash fics; but I can take the label as a warning to hit the back button just as well as someone else might take it as an enticement to read.

But what happens when the warning/label means different things to different people? In the Dean/Jess story I linked to above, is that really enough to be triggering for someone? If so, if it should have a warning on it, that warning can't serve the dual purpose of attracting a reader, like me, who enjoys dub-con...because to me that story is fully consensual.

I doubt we'll ever get a real consensus in fandom on the subject of warnings. This is just me realising the issue is more complex than I'd realised before.

[identity profile] rockeandroll.livejournal.com 2008-06-28 10:05 pm (UTC)(link)
Well, I guess the other issue with warnings IS the interpretation issue. There were some posts on [Unknown site tag] a few years ago about genre expectations and how the header information we put on our fics means that readers tend to go into a fic with certain expectations. Which is fine when a fic is straightforward. Smut, in most cases, is fairly simple, because when the header lists a pairing and a warning for, I don't know, BDSM or sex with cars or something, that's probably what you're going to get.

But there are some labels that can be interpreted different ways, and we could make the warnings more explicit, but then when does it stop being a warning and start being the story in miniature? I remember a friend being frustrated once when someone complained that a deathfic she wrote wasn't warned thoroughly enough. But this reader wanted to know which character died, and how, and who killed him, before even reading the story, and the writer felt that this was too much.

Me, I tend to have trouble just figuring out how to label my fics appropriately, because some of them don't even fit into slash/het/gen easily, let alone the pairing/warning/kink stuff. I wrote a short fic a while ago that was a bit of a "show don't tell" exercise; it was all about hinting that a certain character might be gay, and he might have a bit of a crush on another boy, but he might not, and he might actually just be confused. In the end I just stuck a summary on it with no other labels and the only thing resembling a complaint that I got was a couple of men who read it going "Uh, I liked that fic, but I'm not gay. Just so you know."
ext_13197: Hexe (Default)

[identity profile] kennahijja.livejournal.com 2008-06-29 02:44 am (UTC)(link)
I'm not sure that 'dub-con' is really that easily containable with the examples you give above. Obviously, again, we're talking fiction only here.

I'm very fond of the entire variety of fic that deals with consent issues, from mild to noncon/rapefic. And the warning/advertising categories that float around are pretty diverse, and unfortunately very vague too - you have ambiguous consent, dub-con, coercion, non-con, rape... all, I would argue, potentially overlapping but not necessarily describing the same thing. People are interpreting these differently, and will therefore use them with different meanings, which doesn't help either.

My personal favourite are blackmail-type fics, which I would usually label as dub-con (because it's a more common fandom term), although coercion would be more precise. Though others would put it firmly under non-con. I don't think it's possible to come up with (or standardise) an interpretation that will be acceptable for everybody, because subjective interpretations will always differ.

Outside the sexual content, for example, I throw a fit (and boycott the fic) if a header spoils me for character death, and won't warn for it either apart from vague 'darkfic/disturbing content'. A lot of people, on the other hand, really want to be warned for this, and making everybody happy just doesn't seem to be possible.

[identity profile] nemesister.livejournal.com 2008-06-29 02:48 am (UTC)(link)
That's why I like the awful and shocking variety to be labeled "rape" and I often see it done that way. Extreme violence needs its own warning anyway.
ext_3537: Riff Raff from the Catillac Cats (Default)

(here from metafandom)

[identity profile] valentinite.livejournal.com 2008-06-29 03:02 am (UTC)(link)
I'd add another category: the category where the non-POV character has reason to think there isn't consent, but the reader knows there is. (Generally the non-POV character is dominant, but not always, or it doesn't even have to be a sort of sex where that matters.)

The simplest form of this is just lots of alcohol, and one person thinks they're taking advantage of the other's intoxication. But since the drunk character is the POV character, we really know that they're all for it, and would be sober, too.

I've seen authors manage to pull this off from both sides at once -- i.e. they *both* think they're taking advantage of their drunk friend (whom they've been secretly lusting after). And while I realize it's a silly storyline, it's also, honestly, a bulletproof story-kink of mine.

It doesn't have to be alcohol -- sex pollen, spells gone awry (hello, HP fandom), etc.

[identity profile] esorlehcar.livejournal.com 2008-06-29 03:10 am (UTC)(link)
Sam took advantage of Dean being drugged/drunk and Dean didn't specifically consent to sex on that night, the boys had discussed it beforehand and Dean's consent is implied because he has a safeword and chooses not to use it.

A lot of what you say in this post is very interesting, but I find your explanation that that story is fully consensual somewhat unsettling. Even if Sam didn't purposefully drug Dean, he "took advantage" of him being non-consensually drugged by equally non-consensually stripping him, trussing him up, and gagging him while he was unconscious from drugs he had not agreed to take.

Yes, AFTER all these non-consensual things had been done to Dean, he did not use his safeword when he was no longer unconscious (given that he's still drugged enough at that point that he can't remember anything that happened, I'm not sure how valid that consent is, but that's a point for another day), but unless they had specifically discussed, and Dean had specifically agreed to, Sam doing all those things to Dean when he was drugged and unable to say no (and when he had not consented to being drugged), Sam had no consent, implied or otherwise, and the fact that Dean eventually enjoyed despite the advantage that had been taken of him doesn't change that fact.
theladyscribe: Etta Place and Butch Cassidy laughing. (Default)

[personal profile] theladyscribe 2008-06-29 03:46 am (UTC)(link)
Oh yay, more discussion!

I like what you say here, and I think you're right that there's an issue because of the terminology. I was warning for dub-con as a possible trigger, rather than a kink (though I have since changed the warning from "dub-con" to "possible trigger"). To my mind, the two are quite different: warning for dub-con as a possible trigger implies that the sex is not necessarily the focus of the story, whereas warning (advertising?) for dub-con as a kink would mean that the sex is the point.

Falling back on my own fic as an example, as I've mentioned in my own post, I wrote the story without considering the implications of consent, partially because I know my version of Jess, but also because, like you, I strongly believe that Dean doesn't go places he's not wanted. And besides, the sex is not the point. The emotional implications of the story is what I want to focus on, and the sex is kind of a means to that end. It was only after the fact that I realized there was a possible implication of dubious consent.

... Um, I'm not entirely sure that all makes sense. It's late here, and I need to sleep.

[identity profile] ifyouweremine.livejournal.com 2008-06-29 04:03 am (UTC)(link)
reading Sasuke/Naruto when you thought you were getting Naruto/Sasuke isn't likely to be a traumatic experience
No, but it's a major annoyance if you happen not to like Sasuke topping Naruto and so you end up getting squicked when the sex scene comes along.

I firmly believe that the top/bottom should be properly labeled in fics; it drives me crazy when I get really invested in a story and then get kicked right out of it when I reach the sex.

Sure, lots of people might not care about who tops or bottoms, but there are also a lot of people who do (myself included, obviously), and I think it's really considerate when an author labels their fic correctly, which lets me know up-front if it's something I want to read.

Also, I don't think warnings are necessarily there to prevent a "traumatic experience," they're also they're so people won't get squicked. I mean, people commonly warn for kinks like fisting and watersports and things like that, and those those aren't likely to trigger a traumatic experience so much as they might gross people out.
erinptah: (Default)

[personal profile] erinptah 2008-06-29 04:19 am (UTC)(link)
There's another dub-con scenario, one which I've almost never seen in fanfic: the scenario where one partner genuinely has no idea that the other isn't freely consenting to the sex.

One of my favorite characters is incredibly susceptible to this (and I've alluded to it in his past a few times in fic, as have a couple of other writers, though I can't think of any extended treatments).

He has this very fundamentalist conception of sex and power and gender roles, which leads to his belief that women and/or subordinates shouldn't be allowed to say no to him, sexually or otherwise. (This has led to harassment lawsuits in canon.) Turn that around and put him with a man he looks up to, however, and he thinks he isn't allowed to turn anything down.

...and, man, I wish there were more fic going into that, because I do like to watch him cry. (Your fiction-is-not-reality disclaimer is in full force here, mind you.)

I would really love to see a slave!fic in which a loving master is genuinely shocked when his slave, given the capacity to consent, turns around and says "no, I'm leaving".

I think I heard a song like that once.

But I guess that wouldn't suit the slashy need for a happy ending.

I can see that. Hm. Maybe if the slave were then paired up with someone else? (I've never written slave!fic anyway, though, so I'm a little out of my depth here.)

Very interesting thoughts; thanks for typing them up!
erinptah: (Default)

Re: (here from metafandom)

[personal profile] erinptah 2008-06-29 04:21 am (UTC)(link)
I've seen authors manage to pull this off from both sides at once -- i.e. they *both* think they're taking advantage of their drunk friend (whom they've been secretly lusting after).

. . . I have got to find me some of that. That sounds awesome.

[identity profile] nike-victory.livejournal.com 2008-06-29 04:24 am (UTC)(link)
Oh, I hear you. One of my favorite dub-con fics isn't labeled as such at all. It's a surprisingly dark story about high school and roles and the characters are so very confused about what they're doing that all they can really agree on is that it's fucked up. And one of the boys is only in this rather twisted sexual relationship because he doesn't really see any other choice and goes along with it, especially in the beginning. I can definitely see it being a trigger for some just as it's a kink for me and each time I think to rec it, I end up debating over whether to inform the person I'm reccing it to about the rather dubious consent because the author doesn't warn for it herself.

[identity profile] ifyouweremine.livejournal.com 2008-06-29 04:25 am (UTC)(link)
(Here via [community profile] metafandom)

I tend to use my warnings to serve the duel function of both warning and enticing. Like, if I warn for non-con I know that's a squick for some people (who'll avoid it) but it's a kink for others (who'll read it).

Your examples of what you consider dub-con and what you don't are pretty interesting; personally, I would consider both examples dub-con (the second one for the reasons you mentioned and the first one because I don't think drugged/drunk Dean was capable of giving consent and Sam took advantage of that).

This kind of reminded me of this idea I heard once that drunken sex is never truly consensual sex because a drunk person can't really give consent, but I don't necessarily agree with that--like, I think if in your example Sam and Dean were both drunk and decided to have sex I would see that as consensual, but in your example it seemed more like Sam was taking advantage of Dean's drunkenness so he could have sex with him, which I definitely think is dub-con.

Anyway, that's all I really had to say on the matter, I guess I'll take my thinking cap off now. ^___~ (Oh, also? If you want SPN non-con or dub-con recs I can totally hook you up. I'm just saying.)

[identity profile] jacquez.livejournal.com 2008-06-29 05:02 am (UTC)(link)
(via metafandom)

There's another dub-con scenario, one which I've almost never seen in fanfic: the scenario where one partner genuinely has no idea that the other isn't freely consenting to the sex.

I can personally only think of one story I've read that fits this definition (in Sentinel fandom). (I might've read others but they're not coming to mind.) I'm not surprised -- it's partially rare because it's difficult to pull off, I think, but also I think it's rare because (although many people can torment characters six ways from Sunday), that particularly weird kind of mindfuckery is queasily unpleasant and reminds people uncomfortably of things they might have done to others that maybe the others weren't so keen on.

Not, like, rape or anything -- but it's this kind of queasymaking Extreme Sports version of Like That Time I Made My Sister Watch Aliens With Me.

[identity profile] velvet-mace.livejournal.com 2008-06-29 05:59 am (UTC)(link)
I write a lot of fic in the dub-con/non-con/rape/violent rape contiuum, and I write with a variety of genres from humor (which drives some readers nuts because rape is never supposed to be funny) to full on sickening horror (which is too much for other readers to stomach). So I've given some thoughts about the subject.

The first thing that occurrs to me is that people tend to treat rape like an on-off switch. You are or you aren't. And if you are, you must be traumatized to the some set degree, and if you aren't you have no right to be upset -- but it seems to me that it just isn't that easy, because there are two dynamics going on: The intentions of the rapist, and the emotional state of the victim before/during and after the act.

For example: You can have a "sweet" guy sweep a girl off her feet, make her feel loved an appreciated, ending with a night of sex that she fully and enthusiastically agrees to, only for her to discover later that the guy only had sex with her on a dare or as a joke so he could brag about it to his pals, or for some other low-life reason. Does she feel violated? Holy heck yes. Was it rape? Er... that's not so clear.

Another example: An 9 year old plays "doctor" with a 13 year old friend who has recently got ahold of a porno mag. The 9 year old doesn't really know what she's consenting to and finds it rather uncomfortable. The 13 year old probably should have known better but wasn't being malicious. They go on to play other games after curiosity is satisfied. Later when they grow up and realize what they've done. The no longer 13 year old feels hideously guilty, the no longer 9 year old shrugs it off as kids screwing around, in this case literally. Dubious con? rape?

Neither of these is the same as someone being dragged onto a beach and gang raped with bottles.

On the fanfic end of things you have as much latitude and more especially if you consider if the motivation for the fic is to titilate, surprise, horrify, sadden or set up for hurt comfort.

I guess this is a long way of saying sometimes the context matters more than the actual acts.

[identity profile] velvet-mace.livejournal.com 2008-06-29 05:59 am (UTC)(link)
btw, here from metafandom . Hi!

Also, that last line should be: sometimes the context matters more than the actual consent.

Also via metafandom

[identity profile] ravenclaw-devi.livejournal.com 2008-06-29 09:13 am (UTC)(link)
For example: You can have a "sweet" guy sweep a girl off her feet, make her feel loved an appreciated, ending with a night of sex that she fully and enthusiastically agrees to, only for her to discover later that the guy only had sex with her on a dare or as a joke so he could brag about it to his pals, or for some other low-life reason. Does she feel violated? Holy heck yes. Was it rape? Er... that's not so clear.

To bring up a fictional example, that reminds me of the movie "40 First Dates." The premise of that movie is that Drew Barrymore's character has a form of amnesia that causes her to forget everything she's experienced the next day. Now, Adam Sandler's character has thus far been in the habit of having sex with women and dropping them afterwards. Obviously, Drew Barrymore's character would be the perfect "target" for this - he could have sex with her, and the next day she wouldn't remember him, so there would be no need to even dump her - he could just act as if he didn't know her and she wouldn't be the wiser.

Of course, this being a happy movie, he doesn't do so, and they eventually marry - but the question is, if he hadn't resisted the temptation and done the "sex her and and leave her" thing, would it have been rape? On one hand, she would have consented to the sex, but on the other hand, she wouldn't have knowingly consented to being sexed and dropped.

Re: Also via metafandom

[identity profile] thelana.livejournal.com 2008-06-29 10:11 am (UTC)(link)
That's how I see it too. The girl in the prank thought she was consenting to happy fluffy romantic sex. She did not consent to being part of a prank.

However, we don't have a word for "being drawn into a prank without prior consent" or "being dragged into a Scientology meeting when I thought you were taking me to dinner" that is as strong as rape it. It's deception, it's false advertising.

It's kinda like the girl who sleeps with a guy in good faith and then suddenly finds herself the star of an internet sex tape. She can sue him because she didn't consent to having her image taken and spread. But I'm not sure if it would be considered rape, whatever else the legal term for non-consensual pornography is.

It might also be comparable to somebody getting sex with false pretenses. Like, he pretend to be a millionaire, she sleeps with him and later finds out that he was just faking it to get her into bed. If she hadn't thought he was rich, she wouldn't have slept with him. He was intentionally deceiving her. It is definitely deception, but is it rape? He mislead her judgement, but he didn't do anything to directly impair her judgement which she could have used to figure out he wasn't really rich. Same for the guy who pretends to be nice. If she had known he was a huge dick who makes a prank with his friends she wouldn't have slept with him naturally.
wychwood: chess queen against a runestone (Default)

[personal profile] wychwood 2008-06-29 10:23 am (UTC)(link)
(here via [livejournal.com profile] metafandom)

There's another dub-con scenario, one which I've almost never seen in fanfic: the scenario where one partner genuinely has no idea that the other isn't freely consenting to the sex.

I've actually seen this done a couple of times in SGA fandom - [livejournal.com profile] neery's Foolproof and Incapable of Error is the best example I can think of. It's quite rare, though, I agree.

Page 1 of 3